讚賞比威嚇孩子更有效

10.05.2023

Xixi, the protagonist of Episode 5 of Tzu Hwee's "Super Dad 2," often failed to follow her parents' instructions. This led to increasingly harsh discipline from her parents, but her misbehavior persisted. After discussing this with her parents, we decided to use specific praise and pre-emptive agreements.

In the fifth episode of "Super Dad 2," a reality TV show produced by Tzu Hwee Young Seedlings, Xixi, the protagonist, often fails to follow his parents' instructions. His parents' discipline becomes increasingly harsh, eventually banishing him from the house to be alone with his friend Chong Chong. Although Xixi fears the punishment, his misbehavior persists.

After observing Xixi's parents interacting with him, I arranged a meeting with them to learn more. During the discussion, Xixi's parents discovered that their son's dwindling motivation to behave well might be due to their lack of affirmation and praise during discipline. The parents also analyzed that when they used intimidation, although their son would eventually comply with instructions, he lacked the motivation to improve his behavior and sometimes even exhibited defiance, which worsened the situation.

Parents, have you ever used threats and spankings to deal with your children's misbehavior? Ask yourself a few questions:

-In what situations do you use threats and beatings to discipline your children?

-How does your parent-child relationship change after you use threats and beatings to deal with the problem?

- If you use threats and beatings to deal with children, will they learn good behavior? Can they continue to behave well?

-If you find that mild threats and beatings are ineffective, do you need to escalate the situation to deal with your child's misbehavior?

If parents stop, take a deep breath, and give themselves 3 minutes to calm down before intimidating, beating or scolding their children, I believe that the way you discipline your children will be different.

The above information was provided by Huang Jiajia, Director of Tzu Hui Seedling Education (Senior Registered Social Worker)